In loving memory

My lovely father, Jack Olliver, passed away on July 27, 2013. The following is what I said at his funeral.


Dad was a man of integrity whose word was his bond. HE never complained and nothing was too much trouble for him. He was generous with his time, talents and possessions whenever he saw a need. Each new grandchild and great grandchild was welcomed with the same love and excitement as I expect his own firstborn was. He loved them all and they loved him.

i can't condense all that he means to me in the short time I have to speak but there is one incident I want to share which left a lasting impression on me and helped to mold me and the way I view the world.

I was about 15 years old and overheard Dad and one of his friends discussing their aspirations for their children. Dad's friend said he expected his sons to go to university and get good high paying jobs. He said he wasn't going to let them be rubbish collectors.  My father replied that if any of his children chose to be rubbish collectors, he would give his full support. His only expectation was that he or she made the effort to be the best rubbish collector they could possibly be and were reliable, honest and fair in the workplace. I felt so proud of him and determined at that time never to disappoint him. My work ethic and values were set at that time.

Dad loved me and my brothers unconditionally. He was non judgmental and gave us the freedom to explore, make our own mistakes and to learn from them.  He gave advice when asked but allowed us to make our own decisions.

Over the last few days I have heard tributes from many and realise afresh what an amazing role model he has been. Not just as a dad and grandad, but with Mum at his side, part of a marriage that has lasted 65 years. He honoured Mum whenever he could and was lost when she was not around.

Over the past year, our roles have reversed and I have had the privilege of being there for him as his needs changed and he became more dependent. Someone said to me that the end of life is like birth in reverse and as I have sat with him over the past few weeks, I have thought about this and written a little reflective piece I would like to share. Dad has passed on his love of poetry and rhyme to each generation which follows and It seems appropriate to say farewell using this medium. Unfortunately Dad, it doesn't rhyme so its not a proper poem as  far as you are concerned, but I know you would never tell me so.




Vulnerable, weak, dependent, helpless

Moments of awareness

Time to sleep, time to wash

Family times

Special memories, recollections of early days

A time of sadness, yet also celebration

Amazing strength

Determination

Tricking us - again and again

Sleeping beside him, listening to the rhythm of his breathing

My stomach in knots, holding my breath as he holds his

Lullabies, prayers, humming, tenderness in songs

Tears and laughter mingled together

Parting is never easy but as long as I live, so will you - in my heart and mind, my deeds and actions, in my children and grandchildren, for there is a large part of you passed down through the generations

You leave a legacy of love, integrity, honesty, loyalty, respectfulness and above all, unconditional love

This is not goodbye - this is, until we meet again

Xxxxxxx

The fabric of life

I had to give another mini sermon at church at the weekend.  I found it really hard to prepare but below is what I ended up with.  Happy reading - hope it makes sense to whoever reads it.

Who am I? Today I am wearing the regalia of the Red Hat Society – yes, I am a “Red Hat lady” – take away the hat and I am just a woman wearing purple clothes. Take away the purple and I am just wearing a red hat – and in danger of being arrested if that’s all I have on.

It’s a uniform that identifies me as belonging to something. Just like a uniform identifies a nurse, fireman, policeman etc

But take away the uniform and I still have an identity. I am a mother, a grandmother, a daughter, sister, writer, quilter, crafter, administrator, gardener and a Christian just to name a few. There is no obvious uniform but there are usually clues which identify me in each of those roles from time to time. I also have a legal identity and have the passport photo to prove it. I am never sure whether to be surprised or offended when an official looks at the photo and then at me and decides in an instant that I am who I say I am. 

But the uniform or photo ID do not define who I am. That comes from something far deeper. I – as are you – was wonderfully created by God and moulded by a myriad of experiences to become the person I am today. In Jeremiah 1:5 God says “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born I set you apart;

So, who am I? This is a question I ask myself regularly. What is my role and purpose in this life? What legacy will I leave behind for my yet to be born great grandchildren. What will my grandchildren tell their grandchildren about me.

Every new day is a fresh challenge and I find myself constantly examining my walk and relationship with God and then my family, friends and others. Who I am now is not who I was when I was a child or a young woman. As I have grown, I have changed.  I wasn’t always a grandmother – I had to be a mother first. So it is in the Christian life, we have to grow – we can’t stay the same if we are to reach our full potential in Christ.

Now, God speaks to me when I am doing those things that he designed me to do and using the talents he has given me. That is when I am closest to Him.  It’s not when I am reading the word but rather when I am pondering it and chatting to him when I am out walking or gardening or being creative in my craft room.

 You might remember that last year I shared a communion message where I talked about crumbs of fabric and how when they are put together, they become something beautiful.   These were useless bits of material usually consigned to the rubbish tin. But by joining them together and re-cutting and ironing, they became something new and useful – and beautiful. But above all, they became whole and unique. 

Small scraps or crumbs

Partially assembled

A finished crumb quilt

Today I want to talk about what happens when through the Ministry of the Holy Spirit we are re-cut and re shaped from something very ordinary and acceptable but in such a way that we become an even more beautiful creation.

I consider myself to be a very ordinary person and I often marvel at how God reveals himself to me through ordinary everyday things.

I was in my sewing room a few weeks ago, thinking about my identity in Christ and wondering what I could talk about today when the scripture 2 Corinthians 5:17 popped into my mind

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

At the time I was experimenting with colours and an idea I had read about on the internet where you make a quilt top and then once it is all sewn up, you recut it.  I had some beautiful fabrics I had bought especially for this project so, without really knowing what I was doing, I started cutting and sewing.

Not what I was wanting
 - far too busy 

I didn’t like the finished result at all -  the colours, although lovely by themselves, just did not work together the way I wanted and I was disappointed with how it turned out. I tried to fix it by adding another fabric but all I did was add to the colour confusion.  It became what I describe as “busy” with no clear direction or theme.

2 plain pieces of fabric

So it was back to the drawing board. I still had enough fabric to try again but this time I rummaged through my rather large stash and found two plain colours. Neither of these colours stood out by themselves …. They were just ordinary bits of material.

9 patch

But this time I approached the project differently.  I now had some experience in the design and by studying my now rejected projected, was able to work out where to place each colour before I started sewing and cutting.

I sewed them into a nine patch [right] and if that was all I did, the finished result would still have been nice and I would have been quite happy with it. The very first quilts I made were this design and no one ever complained that they were boring or plain.

But as we mature and become more skilled in what we do, we desire to achieve greater results. So, although part of me was quite scared about ruining something that already looked ok, and knowing the mess I made of the previous one,  I knew that I had to take a step of faith and trust that what I had read on line would work, and so I set about re-cutting the squares.

Then I began sewing and before my eyes I could see a transformation taking place.

recut 9 patch

completed quilt

Both of these quilts are the same design but one stands out far more than the other one. Nothing wrong with the pink one – some people quite like it  - but to me, it is too busy and nothing actually stands out.

One is made from specially chosen fabrics and put together without any planning.  I made the mistake in thinking that it was the specialness of the material that would make it a beautiful quilt. But I was wrong. It is too busy. Conversely, what could be considered a plain and very ordinary quilt has been transformed into something quite extra ordinary. Can you see the difference? By being prepared to re-cut and step forward in faith, I have created something which stands out

As I spent the afternoon making both these quilts, God showed me again how he works with each one of us and reshapes us as we journey with Him.  We have to be prepared to be recut and reshaped if we are to reach our full potential in Him. And we don’t have to be anything special for him to craft something beautiful – we just have to be available and willing to be moulded.  I have actually just started recutting the pink quilt and look forward to seeing its new identity as a new creation later this year.

Our past is important - God can take the pieces of what we were before and put them in their right place in the work he is doing in his people.

And as he reshapes our lives, our walk with him should deepen and our minds become more Christ focussed and less independent. I know that as I seek His counsel more often, my faith has increased and I am beginning to grasp the truth of Psalm 139 and see his workmanship in my day to day life.

Psalm 139

O LORD, you have searched me and you know me. 

You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. 

Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD. 

You hem me in--behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?

If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. 

If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. 

If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. 

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. 

How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

If there is only one thought that I can leave with you today about who we are in Christ and how he can mould us, reshape us, transform us and make us a new creation it would be this

Philippians 3:20-21

 But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.

Being weed free

A few summers ago, I spent a lot of time farming in a virtual world. It was almost an addiction.  I was often frustrated with myself for wasting so much valuable time playing silly games on the computer but then I would remember that a harvest would be ready and it needed to be gathered before it died and so the circle continued.  I couldn’t bear for a crop to be wasted and I was enjoying the interaction with a group of my friends who became neighbours – not just with me but with one another. None of them knew each other before we started the game so it seemed rather special that they were enjoying the interaction as well.  Never-the-less, I was spending far too much time on the computer and not enough doing more productive things in the real world. 

I told myself that farming in a virtual world made me more aware of my real garden and how important it is to do things properly if I want flowers to pick and fruit and veges to eat.  Every evening I tended my virtual farm, clearing weeds, watering and harvesting crops, plowing the land and resowing ready for the next day. I even visited neighbouring farms and helped them as well.

And, almost every day I wandered around my real property, hose or watering can at the ready, and tended my small crop of both edibles and pickibles. But, although I had a near perfect garden in the virtual world, I didn’t make the time to deal with the weeds in the real world. Consequently they grew bigger and stronger without me really noticing until all of a sudden they seemed to have taken over.  I missed seeing that some veges were ready for picking and flowers were being smothered under a mass of weeds.

  

I was pottering about outside and suddenly became aware of weeds everywhere.  I leaned down and pulled at one … it came out easily as did the next half dozen or so. The soil was dry and loose. Then I spotted some bigger ones and gave a little tug. Nothing happened. I tugged again and still was unable to shift it. So I got down on my knees and using my hands, cleared around the main stem until I could get my fingers underneath, and then I pulled… this time successfully.  The next weed was not so easy – it snapped as I pulled it and the roots stayed behind in the ground. This one required a trowel to loosen the soil before I could remove it completely.

I wandered over to a flower plot and stared in amazement at how the weeds had overtaken it.  I had weeded it earlier in the season and foolishly expected it to still look as good as it had that day. I could see lovely flowers above the weeds – indeed I had been picking them almost every day – but it wasn’t until I started to clear the weeds away that I found there were even more beautiful flowers lying unseen underneath.

All this gave me pause for thought. What am I to learn from this God, I asked.  I knew without a doubt there was a lesson there but what was it? Every time since then that I have gardened, God has spoken to me as the master gardener and illustrated many messages.

So today I thought it might be interesting to share some of these and to look at the Christian journey as a gardener.

God became the master gardener at creation. In Genesis 2 we read

Now the Lord God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed.  The Lord God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground—trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food. In the middle of the garden were the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil........ The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”

The garden was perfect.  Creation was perfect, and man was in charge of the garden.  All things were in place and ready.  But, something happened.  The garden became broken.  

In any garden there are rules. Some of you will know about companion planting where one plant supports another whether it be by attracting the bees because of its colour or emitting some odour that keeps the bugs away. Conversely some plants will overshadow another plant so it cannot take in sunshine.  Sometimes a plant pulls too much of one kind of nutrient from the soil so that both types can’t grow well in close proximity. 

In God’s garden, there was only one rule.   Adam and Eve were supposed to leave a specific tree alone.   

You know how that turned out.  Adam and Eve didn’t do as they were told and the perfection of creation was broken.  It wasn’t perfect anymore, and sin entered the world.  And we have had to work hard to keep our gardens weed free ever since.

Genesis 3:17-19

To Adam he said, “Because you listened to your wife and ate fruit from the tree about which I commanded you, ‘You must not eat from it,’ “Cursed is the ground because of you;  through painful toil you will eat food from it  all the days of your life.  It will produce thorns and thistles for you, and you will eat the plants of the field.  By the sweat of your brow you will eat your food until you return to the ground, since from it you were taken; for dust you are and to dust you will return.”

For some people, gardening is their passion. They love to spend all their time outside, digging, weeding and planting and can happily spend a whole day doing nothing else. As much as I enjoy a neat tidy garden and its produce, I’d much rather spend my time doing other things. However, the desire to be in the garden comes upon me occasionally and I might have a day when I am very enthusiastic and energetic but it doesn’t last long. But I expect the efforts I make to be long lasting and feel very frustrated when the weeds sprout up again. And rather than blame my own lack of discipline = because surely a half hour every day would be far more productive than 2 or 3 hours every few months – I blame circumstances which prevent me from doing what should be done. Sometimes, my Bible reading is a bit like that too … I am just grateful that God speaks to me in more than one way.

Let’s look at weeds for a bit.  I am not going to quote scripture as we work through these = I want you just to think about the application and the Christian parallel.

·        Weeds are plants we really don't want around. They are very effective at camouflage and can smother the healthy plants. They grow very quickly and often are not noticed until they are well established in the soil.  Some are easy to remove but others require more effort.  One thing I do know is that weeds must be removed completely or they grow again. Think of weeds as sin, bad habits or distractions from God.  If we allow these to grow unchecked, we are in trouble. Even just tossing them aside is not good enough – I cleared a large plot of ground and left the weeds just lying in a pile.  It wasn’t long before they took root and re-established themselves.

·    They grow faster than most other plants – After some rain and warm temperatures, some appear from nowhere overnight. I don’t remember ever having that problem with flowers and veges.

·      They are hard to kill  - If left to nature, flowers always lose out to weeds.  When's the last time you saw roses growing along the sides of State Highway 1?  But there are the weeds, proudly jutting from the cracks in the pavement. 

·     They are self-centered - They draw away nutrients from the soil and steal warming rays from the sun, making it more difficult for the good plants to thrive. 

·        Some weeds leave a long trail behind … e,g, convolvulous.  You have to go back to the very beginning to remove it.  Meanwhile it has beautiful flowers which trick you into thinking it is something it isn’t.  I left a weed in my garden because I didn’t know what it was … it was pretty which was good enough for me at the time. But after a few weeks it was obviously a weed – it had more than double in size and had covered up one of my fruit shrubs and when cleared, I found some giant sized fruit just waiting to be picked.

·        Cooch – growing underneath the ground – unseen. Tangled with roots of good plants and I had to remove some perfectly good vegetable plants at the same time if I wanted to remove this weed completely. I was able to save some of the veges but had to move them from the place they were originally planted.

·        You have to get down on your knees and get your hands dirty when you garden. And you might hurt for a day or two after weeding – depending on how much effort you put into it. But the pain eventually passes and you get a lot of pleasure from seeing that well tended garden.

What can we do to make sure our gardens are places where the color and fragrance of God can be seen?  Here are some suggestions:

·        Know your flowers - It would be very difficult to know the vast array of weeds out there – there are thousands of varieties.  But we usually recognize the good plants.  Likewise, we should spend time learning the truth of God's word and coming to discern the presence and leading of His Spirit in people and situations, . You don't need to know what every weed looks like, but being thoroughly acquainted with your flowers enables you to eliminate the intruder quickly without destroying your beauties.

·        Check for weeds regularly.   Successful gardening requires discipline and you need to check the progress of good plants. I love going out in the morning to see what seed has popped its head above ground.  There are times when it’s hard to tell if it’s a young plant or a weed and you have to wait to see how it develops but keeping a close watch on your plantings will usually reveal those intruders that would do harm to your garden.

·    Because weeds grow fast and are hard to kill, the wise gardener removes them when they are young.  Once you see a small weed it is time to go in for the kill. If you don't get the root, it will reappear and spread.  When we become aware of spiritual concerns in our lives whether it be at church, family or social groups, we should confront them sooner, not later.  Waiting too long can make removal much harder in the future. 

·        Plant flowers, and use lots of mulch. The best way to prevent the onset of weeds is to plant lots of flowers and cover the rest of the bed with a thick layer of mulch.  The flowers grow and shut out the light to the weeds, preventing them from growing.  As well, the mulch chokes out the undesirable shoots and keeps the nutrients for the flowers only. 

·        Keep your garden watered. One day after heavy overnight rain, I decided to clear a few weeds. I was amazed to find the soil was dry.  It looked wet but when I scratched the surface, it was clear the rain had not gone deep enough to do long term good. There have been times when I have watered the garden, especially the pots, and watched the water either run straight through and out the bottom, or sit in large puddles on the surface.  This generally means the soil is very dry and needs gentle watering over a much longer period.

·        Fertilise the garden and keep it bug free.

Cultivating good intentions, Godly habits and loving acts is the way to weed prevention.  If the bad can choke out the good, then the good can choke out the bad.  Romans 12, ends with these words:  'Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.' (v.21)  Great gardens don't have any room for weeds.  Yes, keeping them tidy is tiring and costly, but the alternative is to allow the glory God intended for the lives of His children to be swallowed up by thorns of defeat and pain.

Paul says, See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. (Hebrews 12:15 KJV). The reason weeds take over a garden is because the gardener doesn't pull them up fast enough. When your garden is choked by weeds you can't say, 'I don't know how it happened!' When you are 'looking diligently' you will see them moving in. The only way to stay free of the weeds the enemy wants to sow in your life is to be attentive to the condition of your heart.

 (Galatians 6: 7 - 10), Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.Whoever sows to please their flesh, from the flesh will reap destruction; whoever sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life.Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.  Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people,

This Bible verse makes sense when it comes to growing a good crop, but the verse is really talking about something called a spiritual harvest.  Jesus wants us to lead lives that will please Him,

Just to sum up briefly

·        Without water, the plants die. Water gives life. The Word of God is life. Without the Word of God, faith dies

·     Without fertilizer, the plants are puny.  Fertiliser is encouragement and fellowship with the Holy Spirit.  Without either of these, we don’t grow but remain stunted and small.

·   If plants aren’t harvested when they are ready, they wilt. If we ignore someone’s gifts and talents, then that person can be discouraged and withdrawn and will shrivel up inside.

·     If you are serious about removing the weeds from your life – get down on your knees. Talk to God about it. John 15:5  "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.

·        And the best thing of all – even when the weeds take over the garden, flowers still bloom.  They might not be seen but they are still there. Remove the weeds and the beauty can be seen again.